It’s so weird to think that this sweet season is over. Guatemala truly has a piece of my heart forever. There is so much to miss.

Watching the sunset behind the volcano.

Worshipping with my best friends every Thursday.

Hugging kids who have my whole heart.

The end of Guatemala was so bittersweet.

About halfway through my time here, I hit a point where I was really struggling. I remember wondering if it would be better if I just went home. I felt tired and honestly a little defeated. But in that place, the Lord continued to tend to my heart. He met me right in the middle of the hurt. Instead of letting the struggle push me away, the Lord used it to draw me closer to His people. Looking back, I really believe He used my hurting to help me see the people around me better. When I allowed Him to love me in my weakness, it helped me love others louder. I learned how to show up to ministry with a joyful heart, even when I didn’t feel full. I learned how much our heart posture matters before the Lord. And I learned something that surprised me: how much God delights in answering our prayers. I realized how often I don’t actually ask Him for things. But when I slowed down, sought Him, and simply asked, He answered faithfully. Again and again. When I was running on empty, He sustained me.

One of the most special parts of the end of Guatemala was PVT (Parent Vision Trip). It was a beautiful and stretching second-to-last week. It was beautiful because I was so ready to see my parents. Hugging them for the first time in seven months felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders. But even sweeter was watching how deeply the Lord met them while they were here. Ever since I really started chasing after the Lord, I’ve prayed relentlessly for my parents. I’ve prayed that they would commune with Him deeply, that they would fall madly in love with Him, and that the things of this world would grow dim in the light of the Father. On the last night of PVT, I watched my mom get on her knees and weep before the Lord. It felt like God met both of us right there in that moment. It was like a confirmation that even when things are hard, He is still faithful and still working. Watching that was a joy I hadn’t felt in a long time.

At the same time, having my parents there was also stretching for me. In a strange way, I felt like I didn’t know how to act. The Lord has changed me so much over these past seven months. He has moved in my life in ways that feel radical. I don’t feel like the same person I was before I left. But suddenly I was with people who knew the “old me,” and it felt like they still saw me the same way. I started to feel like I had to perform, like I had to prove that I had changed. I found myself getting anxious and distracted by that pressure. But when I finally stopped and brought that to the Lord, He met me there too. And when I let Him, I was able to just watch the blessings unfold. I got to see answered prayers right in front of me and it was really sweet.

Leaving Guatemala is so sad for me. The kids, the people, and this place will always hold a piece of my heart. But I am so grateful for a season that taught me how to truly lean on God and trust Him to guide me.

Guatemala, thank you for everything.

Honduras, here we come.